The New Sannin
by AnimeFreak4261
Summary: Sakura, Naruto and Itachi are the new Sannin. Naruto is Hokage and Itachi and Sakura are the leaders of the Akatsuki. How will Sasuke react to this? And whats this? Sakura is Itachi's girlfriend! slight itaxsaku moments. full summary inside.K just in case
1. Coming Back

The New Sannin

**Summary:** Sakura is kidnapped by the Akatsuki after Sasuke left to heal Itachi's eye's and finds out she doesn't really care. Afew years after she left, Naruto becomes Hokage, and Sakura becomes leader of the Akatsuki. Both are named Sannin, while Itachi is named the 3rd. Sasuke comes back to find everything different. ItaxSaku

**Note:** Major sasuke bashing. Also, Naruto is not worried and does not look for Sakura because he recieves a letter from her saying she is fine and happy. They keep in touch, and when Sasuke comes back, Naruto invites him along on a visit to Sakura. When they get there, Sakura can't remember Sasuke at all. lol XD.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Naruto, both me and my friends agreed it should bascily go like this story.

"bla" talking

_'bla' thoughts_

It had been 4 years since Sasuke left, and he was finally going home to Konoha and his friends. Sasuke smiled at the though and ran the rest of the way to the gates, expecting to see Tsunade at the gates, scowling, Sakura crying and Naruto smiling like the idiot he was. But what he saw was completely different. He saw instead, Naruto there, looking extremely serious, no sight of Sakura, and Kakashi looking grim. Sasuke frowned and ran up to them. He was about to ask what happened when he got round-housed kicked to the head and flew back into a tree. When he looked up he saw Naruto standing, looking like he had just kicked some one.

"What the hell was that for dobe?!"

"WHY NOW?? WHY DID YOU HAVE TO COME BACK NOW? WE WERE ALL HAPPY WITHOUT YOU!!" Naruto screamed at Sasuke, who just sat there, shocked. Naruto had never yelled. Well, at least not in a bad, serious way. Sasuke got up and was about to ask what he was talking about when another question came to mind.

"Where is Sakura." at this, Naruto calmed down and looked away, mumbling something that wasn't understandable.

"What?"

"I said she is with the Akatsuki!!" Naruto practically yelled again. Sasuke was frozen in shock. Sakura with the Akatsuki? Impossible.

"In fact, she's one of the leaders and is currently dating and is girlfriend to the other leader." Sasuke was now seething mad. Not only was she one of the leaders of the Akatsuki, but she was someone's girlfriend?

"Who?"

"What?"

"Who is the other leader?"

"Um...before I tell you, Kakashi, tie him up. Tight. We don't want him destroying everything." At the Hokage's demand, Kakashi tied up Sasuke tight to a large tree with chakra restraining ropes. Once Naruto was satisfied, he spoke.

"The other leader is currently...Uchiha Itachi." Oh boy. If Sasuke was mad before, he's deadly now. Just by rage, his sharingan activated and were spinning rapidly. His chakra went through the roof and the ropes could barely restrain him. After a minute or 2, he finally calmed down enough to take in his surroundings. He was about to ask how that happened when Naruto beat him to it.

"You see, about 6 months ago, Sakura was kidnapped by the Akatsuki to heal Itachi's eyes. I went looking for her and when I came back to the village, I had a letter from her. It said that she was finally happy and that I should stop looking for her. I was so glad that she was happy. I sent her a letter back, so now we have been contacting each other for about 5 and a half months. She is content with her new life and boyfriend. I became Hokage and immediatly sent her a letter telling her. She was so happy for me, there were tear stains on the letter. Awhile later, I got one that said she and her boyfriend were officially appointed the new leaders of the Akatsuki since the leader died. I was so happy for her. She was a strong, happy, kind kunoichi, like she wanted. Around 2 months back, me, her, and her boyfriend were officially announced as the new Sannin. Itachi took your place Sasuke. He was everything you weren't and more. He was kind, caring, warm, he cared for his friends, and he was always there. We were and still are happy. Now, if you promise not to try and kill them, would you like to come along with me? I'm going to visit them."

It took awhile for Sasuke to absorb all the new information he had just heard. Sakura kidnapped...happy...hokage...boyfriend...leaders...sannin...everything I'm not. When he finally got to the invitation, his answer was instantanious.

"Yes."

**Me: how did you like it? lots of Sasuke bashing later! woot! please review!! and yes, i know its short. but believe me, if i went on, it might take you like 3 hours to read.**


	2. Meetings and Bob

The New Sannin

**Summary:** Sakura is kidnapped by the Akatsuki after Sasuke left to heal Itachi's eye's and finds out she doesn't really care. Afew years after she left, Naruto becomes Hokage, and Sakura becomes leader of the Akatsuki. Both are named Sannin, while Itachi is named the 3rd. Sasuke comes back to find everything different. ItaxSaku

**Note:** Major sasuke bashing. Also, Naruto is not worried and does not look for Sakura because he recieves a letter from her saying she is fine and happy. They keep in touch, and when Sasuke comes back, Naruto invites him along on a visit to Sakura. When they get there, Sakura can't remember Sasuke at all. lol XD.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Naruto, both me and my friends agreed it should bascily go like this story.

"bla" talking

_'bla' thoughts_

**Somewhere in a Forest**

Sasuke was really anxious to see Sakura again. He wanted to look into her eyes. He had been traveling with Naruto and Kakashi for 5 hours and it was getting close to dusk. They would have to stop and make camp soon if not find a town and rent a hotel room.

"Ok, we're stopping to camp here." Naruto's voice could be heard over the wind as he pointed to a clearing. Sasuke sighed and jumped down. Kakashi started setting up the tents, while Naruto was building the fire. Sasuke decided to collect some food so he went searching and 15 minutes later came back with 3 fish just to find Naruto and Kakashi pigging out on ramen, sushi, sashimi, udon and tempura. They both looked up at him and tried hard to suppress laughter at the sight of a blushing/angry Sasuke carrying 3 fish. Sasuke threw the fish into the bush and went to sit down with Naruto and Kakashi and started eating some ramen, only to find that it was Naruto's special wasabi ramen. Sasuke realized what he just ate and soon his face turned red, his eye's started watering and he made gagging noises at how hot it was. This time, it was just too funny. Naruto burst out laughing and fell over from laughing so hard. He became close to no air so he stopped himself and breathed. This would be an interesting night.

**Morning**

Sasuke got up and went out of his tent to find Naruto and Kakashi already up, dressed, fed, packed and ready to go. He scowled at them snickering and went to change. After he was changed, Sasuke packed up his tent and they set off. After 2 hours of silence, they approached a deserted looking village. They all stopped and continued walking until they turned a corner and came face to face with...Itachi and Sakura. Sasuke was definatly not expecting them, so the first thing he noticed was how well Sakura filled out. (AN: pervert) He quickly snapped out of it though upon hearing Naruto, Sakura and Itachi talking.

"Naruto! How have you been? It's so awsome that you became Hokage like your dream!" Sakura smiled at her old friend and current leader of Konoha.

"Sakura-chan! I'm great! How about you? I know but it's just as awsome that your one of the leaders of the Akatsuki!"

"Hello Naruto-kun."

"Itachi! How've you been? You had better been treating Sakura-chan right or else."

"Yes Naruto, he's been treating me right. Oh, I see you've brought a friend!" Sakura said as she noticed Sasuke for the first time.

"Your...uh...um...oh god, what's his name...um...um...chicken-ass hair?" Sakura guessed at Sasuke's name while snapping her fingers trying to remember his name.

"Uh, no."

"Oh, then how about emo!"

"No."

"Bastard?"

"No."

"Chicken-ass emo bastard?"

"NO!"

"Oh I know! Your Bob right?"

"Huh?"

"Cause you look like a Bob to me. Don't you think so Itachi?"

"Ya, he does look like a Bob. Hey, aren't you my little brother? No wait, you couldn't be. My little brother isn't gay."

"I am not gay!"

"Anyways, are you sure your not Bob? Cause seem an awful lot like this guy I met and his name was Bob."

"MY NAME IS NOT BOB!! Sakura! Don't you remember me? I was the guy you used to stalk!"

"Um...nope I don't remember you. Hey, wait a minute. How do you know my name? OH MY GOD!! YOU'VE BEEN STALKING ME HAVEN'T YOU!!!"

"What?" Itachi growled while cracking his knuckles. He was extremely pissed at hearing that someone was stalking his girlfriend.

"What! Sasuke, you've been stalking Sakura?"

"NO!!"

"OH!! Now I remember you! You're the emo bastard who left to get power from a paedofile who only wanted you for your body and then molested you!"

"He didn't molest me I...think."

"You still look an awful lot like Bob my friend."

"And just who is this Bob?" Itachi questioned his girlfriend because he wanted to know who this Bob was.

"Oh just an old friend from when I was really little. He was like a brother to me!" Sakura replied happily to Itachi, who was relieved that it wasn't anything deeper.

"Well anyways. me and Itachi gotta go and do our duties as the leaders. We left Deidara in charge so only god knows whats happened already. Bye Naruto, bye Bob!"

"MY NAME IS NOT BOB!!!"

"Bye Sakura-chan! Tell the others I said hi!"

Sakura turned around and waved one last time before disappearing, leaving a grinning Naruto and a sulking, angry Sasuke. Naruto then turned back to Bob...I mean...Sasuke with a serious expression, told him they were leaving, then turned and left. Sasuke followed soon after. Looking back the way Sakura had disappeared, he couldn't help think that things were infinatley different.

**Me: yes its a short chap but i didnt know what else to put! anyways, please tell me if u want me to end it here or go on.**

**POLL!!!**

**Who should Sakura end up with?**

**Sasuke**

**Naruto**

**or**

**Stay with Itachi?**

**You decide!! Please review!!**


	3. Chicken Sasuke

The New Sannin

**Summary:** Sakura is kidnapped by the Akatsuki after Sasuke left to heal Itachi's eye's and finds out she doesn't really care. Afew years after she left, Naruto becomes Hokage, and Sakura becomes leader of the Akatsuki. Both are named Sannin, while Itachi is named the 3rd. Sasuke comes back to find everything different. ItaxSaku

**Note:** Major sasuke bashing. Also, Naruto is not worried and does not look for Sakura because he recieves a letter from her saying she is fine and happy. They keep in touch, and when Sasuke comes back, Naruto invites him along on a visit to Sakura. When they get there, Sakura can't remember Sasuke at all. lol XD.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Naruto, both me and my friends agreed it should bascily go like this story.

"bla" talking

_'bla' thoughts_

**POLLING HAS ENDED!!! The votes were tallyed and it came to:**

**Sasuke: 1**

**Naruto: 1**

**Itachi: 9**

**So Sakura is going to stay with Itachi! Ok, enjoy the story!**

**Akatsuki**

Sakura was in her office doing paperwork when Tobi came in and handed her a letter. Sakura read the back and saw it was from Naruto. She smiled and ripped the envelope open excitedly. She scaned through the letter before going to find Itachi. It had been 5 minutes and she finally found him in his room, reading a book. She jumped on the bed next to him and shoved the letter into his hands. Itachi raised an eyebrow and looked at the letter.

_Dear Sakura-chan and Itachi,_

_Guess what! I got a week off work so I can come visit you guys and the AHQ (Akatsuki Headquarters)! I can't wait to see you guys again! Oh, and I'll bring Sasuke...I mean...Bob along with me so he can meet everybody, ok? I'll see you the day after tomorrow! I'll be arriving around 4pm. Bye!_

_Konoha Hokage, Naruto Uzumaki._

Itachi read through the letter before looking back at his girlfriend and smirked. He closed his book and got up. He then pulled Sakura to him, quickly kissed her on the lips and left to finish his paperwork. Sakura just smiled and skipped out of the room. She couldn't wait until the day after tomorrow. (Wednesday)

**Wednesday, Akatsuki HQ**

It was approaching 4 and Sakura was hustling around, trying to get ready. The clock struck 4 and Sakura calmed down. about 10 minutes later, there was a knock on the door, so she went to answer it after calling Itachi. When she opened the door, it revealed Naruto and Bob, I mean, Sasuke. Sakura smiled and let them in.

"It's so nice to see you again Naruto and Bob!"

"My name is not Bob."

"O, ok Bob."

At this, Sasuke looked like this, T.T.

"Anyway, I would like to introduce you to everyone Bob." Sakura dragged them both over to the Akatsuki who were standing in a line. (AN: the order goes from left to right. it goes kisame, deidara, tobi, sasori, hiden, kakuzu, then zetsu.)

"This is fish stick, manshee..."

"Hey! Yeah."

"What?"

"I don't like that name, yeah."

"Fine. You're now splody man. Anyways, This is Splody man, swirly mask dude, puppet man, skeleto dude, creepy black stringy dude, and plant man!"

"Um, Sakura-sama? I'm not a plant."

"O, ok...wait, WHAT??? You lied to me?...and who are you, Steve?" Sakura yelled while pointing at Sasuke. This earned a look from everybody but Sasuke that looks like this: o.O, and a look from Sasuke that looked like this T.T. Sakura then looked at everybody like they were crazy and dragged Naruto and Sasuke all over the base, showing them all the rooms, and where their rooms were. It was 11:00 pm before they were done, so Sakura and Itachi bid them goodnight after dropping them off in their rooms before going back to their own. Sasuke sighed and entered his room. This would be a long week.

**Next Day**

When Sasuke got up, he got dressed and went down the hallway that led to the kitchen and dining room that Sakura had shown them yesterday. When he got there, everyone was already seated, and the only seat left was the one next to Zetsu, who no one wanted to sit by because of what he ate and how he ate it. Sasuke sat down, and breakfast was served. Sakura brought out 2 plates stacked with pancakes, 2 with french toast, 4 with bacon and 2 pitchers of her special home made orange juice, one with pulp, one without pulp. She disapeared one more time and came out with a plate that had 3 human arms on it. Everyone said itadakimasu and started grabbing food off of the plates, fighting over a certain pancake or piece of french toast here and there. Once everyone was satisfied, they all dug in and sighed contentadly as Sakura's delicious food went down their throats. Sasuke took a bite of his bacon and found it so good, he almost cried. The bacon was right in the middle, not crispy, not chewy, and had a slight flavor because of some added maple syrup. (AN: if you've ever had bacon and syrup, its sooo good!) Sasuke forced down the tears and was about to take another bite when he heard a slurping noise next to him. He looked over and saw Zetsu, his face shoved into a slit open human arm, blood gushing from it. Everyone else laughed at Sasuke's disgusted face as he pushed away his plate.

"What's wrong Bob? Lost your appitite (sp?) ?" Tobi joked, deciding to have fun with Sasuke because he was so disgusted. After the comment, Sasuke glared at Tobi until he stopped snickering like the rest.

"Ya, your not chicken, are you?" Kisame followed Tobi's example. Sakura giggled and looked at Sasuke's hair. She got a brilliant idea and whispered into Itachi's ear, who smirked after hearing it, and told Deidara who was next to him. Deidara smiled and whispered it to Kisame, and so on in this fashion until everyone but Sasuke had heard, and everyone was either grinning like no tomorrow or had a wide smirk (AN: coughcoughsmilecoughcough) on their face. Soon, everyone got up and helped clear the dishes. Sasuke was wondering what they were talking about as he walked down the hallway to his bedroom.

**Kitchen**

"Ok, so everyone knows the plan?" Sakura whispered to the Akatsuki once Sasuke was gone, and so he didn't hear them.

"Yep."

"Wait. How are we going to cast the jutsu?" Tobi asked because he wanted to know when they were going to cast the jutsu. It's not like they could just walk right up to him.

"Well, I have learned that everyday, at 1:00 pm, he goes out to train, so I figure, that's when we'll get him!"

"Oh."

"Ok, everybody, get into your place. It's 2 minutes to 1:00 so he should come through here any minute.

Everyone nodded and got into place, looking like they always did.

**2 minutes later**

Sasuke came out of his room and walked down the hallway that led to outside. On the way there, he met Tobi who asked where he was going. He replied training then left. Sasuke walked outside and found a good bunch of trees to destroy. While training, he heard a rustle in the bush but dismissed it for a squirrel or rabbit. What he didn't know was that it wasn't either...

**In Bushes**

"OW!! Yeah."

"Shhhh!!! He'll hear us. You know, for a ninja, you're not that quite." Sakura scolded Deidara for being clumsy and loud. Everyone snickered quietly at Deidara getting scolded until Sakura gave them a glare which would have made Itachi wet pants, which is almost what he did, before getting a hold on himself. Sakura then turned back to the place she had found in the bushes where she had a clear view of Sasuke. She then did a few hand seals and whispered 'Chikin Mane no jutsu- Chicken Behavior no jutsu' and shot a strand of chakra at Sasuke, who got hit and stopped moving. A few seconds past and the Akatsuki thought it hadn't worked until Sasuke started walking around like a chicken, clucking. Everyone burst out in giggles and Sakura started tapeing(sp?) him. He started back to the house, so they followed him. He started pecking at the door, so Kisame let him in. Sasuke waddled (AN: do chickens waddle? well, lets pretend they do if they dont) through the door and started pecking at the ground with...his...nose? Anyways, everyone was laughing, including Itachi. This would be awsome.

**Later**

Sasuke was let out of the jutsu at around 9:00 pm. 9 hours of Sasuke as a chicken video. Sasuke was on the floor, waddling around, so when he was let out of the jutsu, he obviously wondered what he was doing on the ground, so he decided to ask.

"Um...what am I doing on the ground?"

"I don't know." Sakura answered in an innocent voice that would have convinced anyone.

"Ok. How come I can't remember what I did for the past 9 hours?"

"Well, if you really want to know what you did, go on youtube(AN: lets pretend they have youtube) and search 'Sasuke as a Chicken'."

"Ok, thanks. Wait, what?"

"Oh, nothing, just search it."

Sasuke was still suspscious but did anyways. When he found the video and watched it, all he could do was stare. There was him, acting like a chicken, all the members of the Akatsuki around him, laughing and pointing. Naruto was rolling on the ground and laughing. Sasuke turned off the computer, calmly got up, went to his room, shut and locked the door, and burst out crying and yelling. You could hear his sobs and sayings of 'I'm scared for life!' throughout the base, so everyone was laughing again. Oh yes, this would be an interesting weak with Sasuke the chicken boy.

**Me: how did you like it? Please review! I might not be able to get the chap up for awhile because I have 2 more finals, then I'm going away to a place that has no internet for a month! WAAA! anyway, please review!!**


	4. Soap, Chair, Milk Carton and Pillow

The New Sannin

**Summary:** Sakura is kidnapped by the Akatsuki after Sasuke left to heal Itachi's eye's and finds out she doesn't really care. Afew years after she left, Naruto becomes Hokage, and Sakura becomes leader of the Akatsuki. Both are named Sannin, while Itachi is named the 3rd. Sasuke comes back to find everything different. ItaxSaku

**Note:** Major sasuke bashing. Also, Naruto is not worried and does not look for Sakura because he recieves a letter from her saying she is fine and happy. They keep in touch, and when Sasuke comes back, Naruto invites him along on a visit to Sakura. When they get there, Sakura can't remember Sasuke at all. lol XD.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Naruto, both me and my friends agreed it should bascily go like this story.

"bla" talking

_'bla' thoughts_

**Akatsuki HQ, Kitchen.**

Sasuke had gotten up extra early so he didn't have to sit next to Zetsu again. But when he got the kitchen, everyone was already up and sitting in the same spots as last time. Sasuke growled and sat next to Zetsu again, who smirked at the glare that was sent his way.Sasuke growled and turned away as breakfast was served. Once again, he heard the slurping noise and frowned deeper. After half a hour, he couldn't stand it. Sasuke snapped.

"AHHHHH!!!! I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE!! IT'S DRIVING ME INSANE!!! AHHHHHH!!!" Sasuke screamed as he pulled at his hair. The Akatsuki blinked and heard a door slam. Sakura sighed and went to change to take a shower.

**Bathroom**

Sakura walked into the bathroom in a towel, only to see Sasuke, huddled by the sink, on the counter. Sakura blushed at him being there and asked him a simple question.

"Bob, what are you doing on the counter?"

"I'm not Bob, I'm a bar of soap."

"Um...ok. Well can you leave because I need to take a shower."

"I can't leave, I am soap. Besides, aren't I supposed to help wash you?"

"EWWWW!!!! Wait, if you're soap, how come you can talk?"

"Shut up."

"...AHHHHHH!!!! ITACHI!!!! BOB IS BEING A PERVERT AND SAYING I'M SUPPOSED TO WASH WITH HIM!!!"

"WHAT??? THAT BASTARD!! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU BOB!!"

"I told you, my name is not Bob. I can't have a name, I'm soap." right after Bob-I mean- Sasuke said this, Itachi appeared in the doorway, very angry. He marched in, picked up Sasuke and threw him out.

"There, now Bob the bar of soap is gone."

"Thanks!" Itachi sweat dropped at the mood swing but shrugged it off.

**Later**

Sakura sat down at the coffee table on a very squishy chair. Not comfortable, squishy. When she looked down, Sasuke's face was there. Sakura screamed once again, Itachi came running, and she jumped into his arms.

"ITACHI!!! BOB IS ACTING LIKE A CHAIR SO HIS FACE WAS UNDER MY BUTT!!!" Sakura screamed while crying into Itachi's shirt. Itachi was extremely angry. He picked up the Sasuke chair and threw it outside.

"Hey! You can't put me outside, I'm a chair! Chairs belong inside!"

"Ya, well, you're not a chair!" Itachi yelled and slammed the door. He then stormed back to Sakura, who was screaming again. By this time, it was past lunch time, so Sakura was most likely in the kitchen. Itachi walked in to see Sasuke, dressed in white, saying he was a milk carton. Itachi closed his eyes and calmly responded.

"YOU ARE NOT A MILK CARTON!!!"

"Yes I am."

"No you're not."

"Are too."

"Are not."

"Are too."

"Are not."

"Yes."

"No."

"YES!"

"NO!"

"STOP!!" Sakura yelled in the middle of the fight, the part where Itachi was about to punch the 'milk carton'. "Itachi, He's clearly gone insane. He should just deal with it for awhile until I come up with a solution."

"Fine." Itachi growled at Sasuke once more and walked off.

**Later that Night, Sakura's Room**

Sakura had said goodnight to everyone and was now walking to her room so she could get some sleep. She hadn't seen Bob -I mean- Sasuke since the milk carton thing. Sakura walked into her room, got changed and crawled into bed. When she lay her head down, she noticed that her pillow was rather lumpy, so she hit it a few times, which didn't help. Finally, Sakura got annoyed and switched on her light to get a better look at her pillow, with happened to be Sasuke. Sakura's eyes widened. She slowly got out of her bed, calmly opened the door, then calmly...ran down the hallway that led to the living room, screaming like a maniac. Itachi had met her at the entrance to the living room and stopped her from running. When she had finally calmed down enough to talk, she spoke.

"Itachi, please kill him. He was my pillow this time. MY PILLOW!! DAMN YOU BOB AND YOUR INSANESS (sp?) !!!!" Sakura screamed into Itachi's shoulder, who was now boiling mad. (AN: him not his shoulder.) Itachi stormed to Sakura's room and threw open the door, to find Sasuke lying in the exact same postion as before.

"Ok, what this time?"

"I'm a pillow."

"No, you're not."

"Yes, I am."

"No, you're not!"

"Yes, I am!"

"THAT'S IT! I'VE HAD IT WITH YOU!" Itachi screamed, and with that, he walked up to Sakura's bed, picked up the 'pillow', and very calmly...slapped it across that face. Hard. Sasuke shook his head and came back to reality, to find himself in Sakura's room, being held by the shoulders by Itachi, with a very sore face. Sasuke guessed what had happened, got himself out of Itachi's grasp, walked into his room, shut and locked the door, walked over to and lay on his bed...and started ponding the stuffing out of his pillow and screaming 'WHY ME!!!!'.

**Me:, how did you like it? Yes, i know it's a bit short. anyways, here's a preview for the next story, since im going out for the long weekend and i won't have internet. try to see wats going to happen next from this.**

Itachi's eyes widened. He had not epected to find this in Bob's -I mean- Sasuke's closet. I mean, there was a fricken shrine to...

**Well, that's all I'm giving you! Please review! Oh, and it's not perverted and it's not a shrine to Sakura or any other girl, or guy.**


	5. YuGiOh

The New Sannin

**Summary:** Sakura is kidnapped by the Akatsuki after Sasuke left to heal Itachi's eye's and finds out she doesn't really care. Afew years after she left, Naruto becomes Hokage, and Sakura becomes leader of the Akatsuki. Both are named Sannin, while Itachi is named the 3rd. Sasuke comes back to find everything different. ItaxSaku

**Note:** Major sasuke bashing. Also, Naruto is not worried and does not look for Sakura because he recieves a letter from her saying she is fine and happy. They keep in touch, and when Sasuke comes back, Naruto invites him along on a visit to Sakura. When they get there, Sakura can't remember Sasuke at all. lol XD.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Naruto, both me and my friends agreed it should basicly go like this story.

"bla" talking

_'bla' thoughts_

**Sasuke's Room**

Itachi and Sakura had decided to find out what Sasuke was hiding. He had been sneaking around lately, barely talking, never letting anyone inside his room. They knew something was up, so they decided to find out. Naruto was distracting Sasuke, and since it was after lunch, they had a few hours at most. Sakura went in first. She signaled that it was clear and went to search under his bed, while Itachi searched his closet. Sakura huffed at having no success, so she went on to his clothing drawers. Itachi was still shoving his way through the closet, until he came to the back wall. He spotted a button that was poorly concealed and pressed it. The back wall moved in a bit, then slid to the left, revealing a seperate room. Itachi had not expected this. I mean, he had a frikin shrine to Yu-Gi-Oh in there!

"Sakura, I think I found it." Sakura looked over and walked to stand next to Itachi. She was just as shocked. The weird thing was, they heard chanting coming from farther in. They looked at each other and nodded, going deeper. When they got to the end, they saw a GIGANTIC picture of the pharoh (sp?), and many collectable items like the millenium puzzle, among others. And there, right smack dab in the middle of it all, was Sasuke, bowing and and saying 'Oh Pharoh, mighty pharoh, please teach me your ways. You and Yugi are just so...saucey!!' (AN: don't ask, it's from this thing and my friend wanted me to put it in. It's good apparently.) Around him were various trading cards and a duel disk...wtf??? Itachi looked and saw many shelves crammed with Yu-Gi-Oh movies and episodes, as well as books like 'You too can become a duel master!', 'Dueling made Easy!', 'Yu-Gi-Oh worshipers guide to becoming a better duelist', and 'Rarest Yu-Gi-Oh Cards Ever! Find Them Now in Stores!'. Itachi just stared, left eye twitching, while Sakura was on the ground, having a full on seizure. After her seizure, Sakura finally came to the fact that Sasuke hadn't noticed them and that the one Naruto was talking too was a clone. She then did something expected but a little late, she laughed. Sasuke looked up from his chanting at the sound of laughter and saw a still twitching Itachi and a laughing Sakura.

"W-what are you guys doing here! How did you get in here anyways?"

"Hahaha, oh my go, haha, d! I can't believe that, hahaha, Bob has a shrine to Yu-Gi-Oh! HAHAHAHA!!!!"

"We are here because you were acting strangely, and now I see why. Anyone worshipping Yu-Gi-Oh has probably gone insane. We got the same way you did, the door."

"Oh. Hey wait a minute, I'm not insane! Yu-Gi-Oh is cool! The way monsters come to life! It's awsome!!" Sasuke yelled and sparkles appeared around him and in his eyes at the last part. Itachi sweat dropped as did Sakura until she remembered the camera she brought just in case it was good for black mail. She smirked and whispered her plan to Itachi. He smirked and walked over to Sasuke and led him out of the shrine room. Sakura then took out her camera and started taking pictures of everything. When she was done, she left the secret room and the bedroom, with Itachi following. Sasuke shrugged and went back to his chanting.

**Akatsuki Living Room**

Giggles and snickers filled the room as all the Akatsuki members looked at the pictures of Sasuke and his shrine. Deidara and Tobi were rolling on the ground laughing while Kisame was holding on to the table for support. Then, Deidara got an idea. (AN:AHHHHHH!!! ITS THE APOCOLYPSE!!! EVERYBODY RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!!)

"Hey un, I got an idea."

"Really? What is it?" Sakura asked as she sat down, waiting for a response.

"Well, why don't we sneak into that room tonight when he's asleep and teepee it, spray paint it, and destroy everything? Then we can take pictures of the room and Bob crying over it! Un."

Everybody just stared at Deidara before breaking into evil grins and laughter. It was the perfect plan.

**Later That day, Around 1:00 am, Outside Sasuke's Room**

Sakura looked at the group and confirmed that everyone was there, so she did a checklist of everything they brought.

"Permanent marker."

"Check."

"Toilet paper."

"Check."

"Spray paint."

"Check."

"Face paint and/or markers."

o.O

"Nevermind, I brought it. Scissors."

"Check."

"Camera."

"Check."

"And paint."

"Check."

"Ok, we got everything. Allright, Zetsu, you go check to make sure he's asleep. Once you've seen he's asleep, unlock the door. We will come in and me and Itachi will lead you to the room. Once inside, Deidara and Tobi, you guys teepee the place. Hidan and Kakuzu, you guys spray paint the walls. Sasori and Zetsu, you guys will cut the magazines and books and draw on the giant picture. Me and Kisame will draw on Bob. Itachi and Naruto, you keep watch cause you can see movement with your sharingan and you've trained your hearing. Everyone got it?"

"Yep."

"Ok. Zetsu, go." Zetsu nodded and disappeared into the wall. He reappeared in Sasuke's room and made sure he was asleep before unlocking the door and letting the others in.Sakura and Itachi led them to the closet and Itachi pushed the button. Once the door was open, everyone set to work. Itachi kept watch on the door and window while Naruto kept watch on Sasuke. Deidara and Tobi were already half way done teepeeing the room. The walls were covered in spray paint, the floor had a carpet of paper and the giant pharoh poster was now sporting a mustache, manacle, and goatee(sp?). Sasuke looked like he was a clown. Satisfied, Sakura called a halt and took pictures. With a final click, they gathered up the evidence that they had been there, went outside and burned it. That done, they went back inside and went to bed, waiting for tomorrow.

**Morning**

"WHAT????NOOOOO!!!!! WHYYYY!!!!!!!" could be heard throughtout the base as Sasuke discovered what had happened to his precious shrine. Snickers erupted but quieted as they heard Sasuke coming down the hallway.

"Who? WHO DID IT???"

"Did what Bob?" Sakura asked with an innocent look.

"Ok, one, my name is not Bob. And two, don't play innocent with me, I know you guys destroyed my beautiful shrine!!" Sasuke said the last part with anime tears. Everyone smirked or smiled and left Sasuke to his crying as they uploaded the pictures on to the internet. Sasuke walked in right after Sakura turned the computer off. She then turned, smirked, got up and left with the others following her, leaving a confused Sasuke.

**Me: i know its short but i couldn't think of anything else to write!! waaa!! im having writers block so send me ideas please!!!!! review!**


	6. Egg Boy

The New Sannin

**Summary:** Sakura is kidnapped by the Akatsuki after Sasuke left to heal Itachi's eye's and finds out she doesn't really care. Afew years after she left, Naruto becomes Hokage, and Sakura becomes leader of the Akatsuki. Both are named Sannin, while Itachi is named the 3rd. Sasuke comes back to find everything different. ItaxSaku

**Note:** Major sasuke bashing. Also, Naruto is not worried and does not look for Sakura because he recieves a letter from her saying she is fine and happy. They keep in touch, and when Sasuke comes back, Naruto invites him along on a visit to Sakura. When they get there, Sakura can't remember Sasuke at all. lol XD.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Naruto, both me and my friends agreed it should basicly go like this story.

"bla" talking

_'bla' thought_

**With Sasuke**

Sasuke woke up and yawned before opening his eyes. He looked aroung and noticed he was in a tight, squishy white room. He tried to lift his arms, only to find he didn't have any. Sasuke looked around frantically, before someone pulled off the roof of the room. He was picked up and when he looked down at the place he had been, there were...eggs.

**With Sakura**

Sakura yawned as she walked down the hallway to the kitchen. She had a sudden urge for eggs today, so she decided to satisfy it. She opened the fridge and pulled out the egg carton. She picked an egg and was about to crack it when she heard a voice.

"No!! Sakura, don't eat me!!"

"Huh? Who said that?" Sakura looked around wildly.

"Down here, in your hand." Sakura looked down at the egg she had picked, to see hair on it that looked like...Bob's??!!

"B-bob? Is that you?"

"No, it's the easter bunny." Sasuke said sarcastically.

"Really!"

"No."

"Oh. Wait here for a sec." Sakura said excitedly and ran off, to come back with a marker. She picked up Bob -I mean- Sasuke and drew eyes and a mouth on him.

"There! Now you have a face."

"Um...my eyes are on the other side." Sakura blinked and turned Sasuke around to see two eyes and a mouth. She sweat dropped before she replied.

"Well, now you have eyes on the back of your head!" she replied happily before frowning.

"Wait a minute, how do I know your not a pig impersonating an egg impersonating Bob?" at this point, Deidara had walked in and was now staring at her like she grew another head. I mean, who wouldn't? She's yelling at an egg! Anyways, Sakura just blinked.

"Don't look at me like that! This egg is Bob! Or so he says, but I think he is a pig impersonating an egg impersonating Bob." Deidara blinked and burst out laughing. Sasori walked in yawning and plucked Sasuke out of her hand before grabbing a frying pan, heating the stove, cracking Sasuke on the pan and frying him. Sakura just stood there and blinked as did Deidara. Sasori finished the egg and went to train. Sakura sighed and went to leave when she heard someone calling her name.

"SAKURA!! Open the fridge!" Sakura walked over and opened the fridge, to see an orange with Sasuke's hair, two eyes and a mouth. She blinked and picked it up. Sakura blinked and put him in her pocket. Itachi walked in to see her put an orange in her pocket. He raised and eye brow.

"It's Bob. He got turned into an egg and Sasori ate him, so now he's an orange." Itachi blinked and looked at the orange in front of him. He sweat dropped and ate him. Sakura blinked. She looked around and saw Sasuke was now a banana. She was about to say something when Tobi grabbed the banana and ate it. Sakura sweat dropped at how everyone was eating Bob...Sasuke. This continued on until Sasuke, who was now a strawberry, asked a question.

"Um...what happens when I become either something like a brush that you can't kill or one of you?" Sakura thought about it before responding.

"Well, we either break you or kill the member, unfortunatly." Sasuke blinked before he was picked up by Hidan and eaten. Sakura looked around until she saw an apricot with eyes.

"Do you know how weird it feels to get eaten multiple times? It's not pleasent. Teeth digging into your flesh and then you slide down the persons slimy throat until you end up in stomach acid where you slowly dissolve into eternity, only to have it happen again." Sakura shivered at the description. Naruto walked into the kitchen and looked at the apricot that Sakura was holding. He smiled, plucked it from her hand and ate it. Sakura looked around but couldn't see anything so she shrugged and made lunch. She set out sandwiches and other things, as well as arms for Zetsu. Zetsu licked his lips and picked up the top arm. All of a sudden it grew eyes. It looked around and screamed when it saw Zetsu. It screamed and screamed...until Sasuke woke up screaming. He panted and looked around to see himself in his room with his own body. He looked at the clock and saw it read 11:00 am, time for breakfast.

**Kitchen**

Sasuke sat down at his chair and licked his lips. Sakura walked in smiling and set a plate down in front of him. He looked at her and thanked her before looking back down at his breakfast and...screaming before running like a girly man to his room. Sakura looked confused.

"What's wrong with him? I thought it would be nice to make an egg that looked like him, but I guess he didn't like it."

**Me: I'm sorry it took so long, but I DONT HAVE IDEAS!!! I will officially stop writing this story until someone send sme an idea or I get one. Please review!**


	7. Bye

GoodBye

**AN: Ok, well, I'm off for three weeks. So don't expect anything new until then. Hopefully I'll live that long. BYE!!!!!**


	8. DDR and Gaara of the Funk

The New Sannin

**Summary:** Sakura is kidnapped by the Akatsuki after Sasuke left to heal Itachi's eye's and finds out she doesn't really care. Afew years after she left, Naruto becomes Hokage, and Sakura becomes leader of the Akatsuki. Both are named Sannin, while Itachi is named the 3rd. Sasuke comes back to find everything different. ItaxSaku

**Note:** Major sasuke bashing. Also, Naruto is not worried and does not look for Sakura because he recieves a letter from her saying she is fine and happy. They keep in touch, and when Sasuke comes back, Naruto invites him along on a visit to Sakura. When they get there, Sakura can't remember Sasuke at all. lol XD.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Naruto, both me and my friends agreed it should basicly go like this story.

"bla" talking

_'bla' thought_

**AN: Hooray! i got an idea and it was thanks to my buddy alex. after this, there will be one more chap and then its over but im starting another story in it's place.**

**Living Room**

Sasuke rubbed his eyes as he strode into the living room only to stop in the doorway, one foot still raised in the air. There, in the middle of the room, was Kisame and Deidara playing DDR with the others cheering them on. Sasuke blinked when music sounded signaling the end of the game. Apparently Deidara won because Kisame started anime crying and ran to the kitchen to gulp down tons of Sake while Deidara jumped up and down. Sakura looked over and waved at Sasuke, who walked over.

"What are you guys doing?" Sakura's mouth fell open and the room went silent.

"You've never heard of DDR????" Sakura asked in an amazed voice. Sasuke shook his head. Sakura frowned, but it was soon replaced with an evil smirk.

"Why don't you try it. You can go against Tobi who is worst at it because of his mask." Sasuke began to speak but was cut off when Sakura grabbed his arm and pushed him onto the dance pad. Sakura chose the song Sweet Temptation. Tobi got ready and the music started. All Sasuke saw was a bunch of colors and arrows with blaring music. It was making him confused so he took a step back. A word appeared on the screen saying 'ALMOST'. Sasuke blinked and stepped again and it said 'MISS'. He blinked and stepped left, catching an arrow so it said 'OK'. (AN: they are almost done the song so he has missed about 41/52 arrows and got 1 ok and one almost.) Sasuke stared at the screen as he saw a double arrow and cocked his head to the side. He blinked as it passed and turned his head when he heard muffled giggling. Sakura and Naruto were nearly doubled over trying to hide their laughs. Sasuke frowned. He was about to speak when Naruto beat him.

"Dude, you are the worst DDR player ever." Sasuke scowled.

"And I suppose you are the best?" Naruto calmed down and shook his head.

"Nope." he sniggered again and walked off. Sasuke frowned and went to eat breakfast.

**1 am, Living Room**

Sasuke peered around the corner of the door frame, and seeing no one, ran out into the living room. He walked up to the DDR machine and turned it on. He stared into the brigth screen and chose 1 player and picked a song. He tried it and got an ok score. Sasuke frowned and tried again and got a good score. Satisfied, he went on to a different song. Here is what he got. Good, good, almost, almost, miss, miss, miss, miss, almost, almost, good, almost, miss, miss, almost, miss, miss. Sasuke frowned again. This went on for awhile until he got to the last song, Love Love Shine. He absolutely sucked. Sasuke swore and was about to try again when he heard sniggering. He looked over before walking over and saw Naruto, Deidara, Kisame, and Tobi sprawled on the ground silently laughing, Itachi and Sasori chuckling and Sakura holding up a video camera that was taping...him. Sasuke's eyes widened and dove for the camera but Sakura was too fast and raced to the computer room with Kisame(AN: you know, while I was typing Kiame, I accidentally typed Hisake. I might use that later!) and Naruto holding Sasuke back. Sakura laughed evily as she uploaded the video on to YouTube. Sasuke cried anime tears. Kisame and Naruto let go of him and they all went back to bed except for Sasuke, who went to pack for a small journey.

**Later, 5 am**

Sasuke left the hideout with food. He needed to go for a walk to calm down and think about how horrible his life was. He started to wander off the trail and soon became lost. When he finally looked up, he was in a dense forest. Sasuke sighed and added lost to his list of bad things happening to him. He wandered around for awhile more until he came upon a clearing. Sasuke raised and eyebrow and smirked when he saw the hideout through the far trees. He walked into the clearing but was confronted by...Gaara?

"Gaara? Wtf are you doing here? And why the hell am I talking msn language? Anyways, can you let me through?" Gaara just stood.

"I am no longer Gaara, I am now, Gaara of the Funk." Sasuke raised and eyebrow and looked around as he heard music.

_'ch ch ch ch, Gaara of the funk!' _(AN: i didnt make this up, it came from the naruto abridged series. check it out its awsome! just search naruto abridged series episode 1-14 on youtube)

"As to letting you through, I'll let you pass, if you can beat me, in DDR."

"DDR? But I-"

"Go!" Immediatly music started playing. Sasuke's eyes widened as he recognized it as Love Love Shine. Gaara was moving at inhuman speed. Here were their scores.

Gaara

Perfect, perfect, perfect, great, perfect, perfect perfect, great, perfect, perfect, great, perfect, perfect.

Sasuke

Miss, miss, almost, miss, almost, almost, miss, miss, almost, almost, miss, miss, miss, almost, miss, miss YOU SUCK!

Gaara

Perfect, perfect, great, perfect, perfect, great, perfect, MARRY ME!!

"The funk wasn't with you. You cannot pass." Sasuke bowed his head with anime tears and slowly turned and walked back into the trees. He wandered around for another hour until he came back to the trail.

"Finally! Now I can-" Sasuke started until he noticed he was on the trail, facing away from the hideout, towards the clearing where he met Gaara of the funk.

_'Ch ch ch ch Gaara of the Funk!'_

"Will you stop that!" Sasuke yelled into the trees before turning around and heading back to the hideout to sleep, dreaming about how his life was hell.

**Me: yes, I know it's short, but i couldnt make it any longer. anyways, next chap will be the last! then im starting a new story that might be a bit slow cause i need to come up with ideas. tell me, should sakura or tenten be the main character? please review!**


	9. A hike and Termites

The New Sannin

**Summary:** Sakura is kidnapped by the Akatsuki after Sasuke left to heal Itachi's eye's and finds out she doesn't really care. Afew years after she left, Naruto becomes Hokage, and Sakura becomes leader of the Akatsuki. Both are named Sannin, while Itachi is named the 3rd. Sasuke comes back to find everything different. ItaxSaku

**Note:** Major sasuke bashing. Also, Naruto is not worried and does not look for Sakura because he recieves a letter from her saying she is fine and happy. They keep in touch, and when Sasuke comes back, Naruto invites him along on a visit to Sakura. When they get there, Sakura can't remember Sasuke at all. lol XD.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Naruto, both me and my friends agreed it should basicly go like this story.

"bla" talking

_'bla' thought_

**WARNING!!WARNING!!! THIS IS THE LAST CHAPTER!! AFTER THIS I AM STARTING A NEW STORY CALLED ULTAMITE!!**

**And Now, On with the story!!**

**Akatsuki Living Room**

Sasuke kept glancing around the room, looking from face to face as to a reason why they had been called here. Deidara had woken him up and 7 am to tell him there was a meeting in the living room and he had to get up and come, thus, Sasuke was sitting, half asleep, waiting for an explanation on the floor with Tobi repeatedly kicking him in the back from the couch behind him. Soon, Sakura and Itachi entered, looking serious and grim. Sasuke guessed it was bad because Sakura was almost never serious. Apparently the rest of the Akatsuki thought the same because the whispering and talking ceased immediatly.

"Akatsuki members, Bob, Naruto, I am sure you are all wondering why I called you all here at such an early time. I have a task for all of us. It will be grueling, hard, possibly painful, but I know you can all accomplish your part." Sakura began in a very, very serious tone which issued serious looks from all.

"Why do you all look so serious? You should be happy! We're going on an all day hike!" Sakura cheered as she threw her arms above her head. This conjured many confused looks, which in turn made Sakura sweat drop.

"Let's try that again. We're going on an all day hike!" she yelled and jumped up and down. This time, many cheered at the prospect of getting out of the base. Sasuke, however, was not thrilled. He saw this as another opportunity to humiliate himself, which was not good. He went to pack anyways since Sakura had to drag everyone along. He some how managed to pack everything just in case he got embarassed enough that he wanted to runaway. Once finished, he walked back out to the living room to see everyone already there. When she noticed him, Sakura spoke.

"Ok, now everyone's here. Let's go!" she finished pointing in the directon of the door. Everyone piled out and arranged in front of the Akatsuki hideout in a line. Sakura, Itachi, Naruto, Kisame, Deidara, Sasori, Zetsu, Tobi, Hidan, Kakuza, then Sasuke, who would be fourth on the way back. They started off and went straight into the woods. Soon, Sakura took a sharp right and went up a steep hill, occasionally stepping on a rock that would slip and hit the rest of them in the head. Up and up they climbed, steeper hill with time passing until they reached a level spot where they stopped to have lunch.

"Hey Bob."

"Ya?"

"Why does it look like you packed all of your things in that bag?"

"Because I did?"

"Why Bob?"

"Ok, first, my name is not Bob and second, just in case I get so humiliated that I want to leave." Sakura cocked her head.

"Your name isn't Bob?" then Sakura caught up with the rest of the explination.

"You want to l-leave? W-why? D-don't you l-like me? WAAAAAAAA!!!!" Sakura started crying while Sasuke tried to quiet her down before Itachi came over or he would be dead. Too late.

"What's wrong Sakura?"

"Bob doesn't like me! WAAAAA!!" Itachi comforted her as he glared at Sasuke, who mushroom sighed. Once Sakura calmed down, they set off again, making it to the top of the mountain by 4:30 and then started back down.

**Later**

They had finally almost made it back to the hideout, but they took a different route so it took a little longer. Sakura seemed to completely have forgotten about what Sasuke said before and was chatting happily with him.

"So then I was like nu uh and she all yu huh, and I was like, no way! and then she was like, oh totally, and that led to a totally different thing with-"

"What was that?"

"Huh? What was what?"

"That thing." Sasuke said and pointed to a lumpish mound. Sakura shrugged and kept walking until Sasuke spoke.

"Now hold on a minute, I want to find out what that thing is."

"Bob, I really don't think that's such-"

"Just let me poke it-"

"Bob, stop, it might be-"

"Just, just hold on a minute and let me-"

"Bob! Come on! Let's-" but Bob -I mean- Sasuke wasn't listening. Now he had picked up a stick and was slowly inching towards the mound. He stretched out his arm to it's furthest length and ever so slightly, tapped the mound. It seemed solid and not dangerous, so Sasuke poked it again, harder. When nothing happened, he wacked it. Hard. He expected nothing to happen. Oh was he wrong. Millions of bugs swarmed out and covered Sasuke, who ran around screaming like a girly man. He spotted the hideout and ran towards it with Sakura calling after him.

"Bob! Stop! Those are termites! They'll eat our hideout! STOP!!" Sakura's calls were unheard by the screaming man, who was still running right towards the front door, with a trail of termites behind him. Once he had ran inside, the termites left him and started devouring the walls. Sasuke ran out just in time to see the entire hideout consumed in termites, which covered every inch. Itachi and Sakura stood on his left, the rest on his right. Seeing their hideout being eaten, Sakura and Itachi turned their heads to glare at Sasuke. Naruto found this the time to speak.

"Well, hehe, we'll just be leaving now...bye!" Naruto said nervously as he grabbed Sasuke's sleeve and ran away from the angry mob. Sasuke sighed. Atleast he had everything.

**Me: Well, that's the end. I hope you like the story. i might make a sequal. right now though, I'm starting a new story called Ultamite. See ya! Ani-chan**


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